What Happens When Cows Go Extinct, EcoGeeks and Models Stalk The Earth

The world as we know it is ending, one minute at a time. Closer and closer we edge to exhausting natural resources. There's no way out for you and I, because the rich will just get richer, and the poor will starve and die in droves.

We'll lose our jobs and have to recenter our economy so we have to commute less and less (or find more economic mediums of transport). The moment that happens, Mr and Mrs 2.5 children are suddenly stuck with a mortage they can't afford in a house that is unprofitable to own.

The lower classes, which will survive by hook or by crook, will undoubtedly find that taking is more effective than working for, so expect crime to escalate. Proof for such a generalization? Go watch Judge Dredd, Mad Max, or just about anything based in the future and produced in the 1980s. All eye opening movies about the future.

Either Mr and Mrs 2.5 find a more economic way of existing, or swallow their lot and band together into some form of communism - wheter it be the strengthening of the standard social units (family, peers, etc), or we come under a crushing economic dictatorship. A free market society doesn't really work when everyone has nothing but debt.

Alarmist? Of course. Farfetched? Probably. Planned for? Already!
Riot control.
When Mr and Mrs 2.5 can't make ends meet and the power has been off for weeks, what happens?
Protesting, rioting, pillaging and looting. The response: Pictured just over there, the latest doohickey in pain inducement.

Active Denial Technology exploits the body's natural defense mechanism that induces pain as a warning to help protect it from injury. It uses a transmitter producing energy at a frequency of 95Ghz and an antenna to direct a focused, invisible beam to a subject at the speed of light and penetrate the skin to a depth of less than 1/64 of an inch. This produces an escalating heating sensation that becomes intolerable in seconds, and forces the subject to flee. The sensation immediately ceases when the individual moves out of the beam or when the system operator turns it off. Despite this sensation, the beam does not cause injury because of the shallow penetration depth of energy at this wavelength and the low energy levels used.

Microwave my geneseed? No thank you! Let's try something else.

Bring about an agarian society. That is, we all go back about 60 years to where Mr and Mrs 2.5 grew produce in the back yard, canned things instead of freezing them and much more.

So how can we convince South Australia to become backyard crop growers? The question itself gives us the answer.

Make bootleg tomatoes worth as much as marijuana. We've got the cottage drug industry in this state, which tends to supply illicit substances like marijuana for a third of the cost as other states.

Steps to make an illegal tomato industry work:

• Immediately outlaw all fruit and vegetables
• Excessive fines for those caught supplying illicit nutrition
• Lessen the cost of hydroponic equipment
• Encourage armed pillaging and looting of Coles and Woolworths trucks. This will up the cost of transporting produce over long distances.

Will this work? Probably not. But what then?

Adelaide will lead the world in green economic production as our industry of skilled drug producers take up a life of backyard farming. When we can't afford to eat, stoners will be recieving the best diet. Isolated enclaves of christian and envirohippy folk will survive too, because they are in some way prepared.
Hot women will survive, because simply, ecogeeks don't like female ecogeeks' rude bits. Mr and Mrs. 2.5 get the short end of the stick in this whole affair because they can't adapt until it's too late.

Don't let this happen! Convert to the cult of the ecogeek today and start blackmarket fruit laundering now!